


Eaten alive

by Niall_Princess_Horan



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Cop Niall, Hurt Niall, M/M, Prison, Scared Niall, Violence, cop Liam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-20
Updated: 2018-11-14
Packaged: 2019-07-14 17:56:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 22,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16045607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niall_Princess_Horan/pseuds/Niall_Princess_Horan
Summary: "Niall Horan. For the sake of humanity and the acts of dishonesty you have presented in deceiving your own team, I have no choice but to question your morals. The fact you have been able to manipulate and steal classified information from US government officials for your own personal gain, has shown you in a sly and cunning light as well as highlighted your intelligence within the sector. Based on these facts, I have no choice but to sentence you to 10 years imprisonment without the possibility of bail or an appeal. Take him down.""No- please- I didn't do anything! You can't- You can't do this. Liam? Liam tell them I didn't do it?! Please-" I beg."-I'm sorry Niall. It's out of my control"





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Sooooooo.... this will be updated at least once a week!
> 
> Any suggestions are great!

Niall POV

 

"Niall Horan. For the sake of humanity and the acts of dishonesty you have presented in deceiving your own team, I have no choice but to question your morals. The fact you have been able to manipulate and steal classified information from US government officials for your own personal gain for 3 years without being detected, has shown you in a sly and cunning light as well as highlighted your intelligence within the sector. Based on these facts, I have no choice but to sentence you to 10 years imprisonment without the possibility of bail or an appeal. Take him down."

"No- please- I didn't do anything! You can't- You can't do this. Liam? Liam tell them I didn't do it?! Please-" I beg.

"-I'm sorry Niall. It's out of my control"


	2. Chapter 2

_____

3 months earlier.

"Niall can you get me an Ebola out on this car?" Liam mumbles as he calls out the registration plate.  
"Yeah sure" I grin and punch the number plate into the system. I log it with the officials and court and put a warrant out for the owners arrest before I head off to do some filing.

The day is relatively quiet. We don't have any current cases at present so I'm just doing filing and administration work. But I don't mind so much. I'm new to the job so it's nice having some quiet catch up days. Especially considering I'm still getting used to arresting people and getting them sent to prison. I still feel bad, but Liam says it comes with the job and it's something I'll have to get used to if I want to make it as a federal agent.

Liam is great. He's my sergeant and superior officer and although we're both qualified police officers of the law, he's more experienced with 10 years on the field where as I'm only 2 years qualified and still learning the ropes. I had the role nailed in my old section doing data protection and such. I'm a technology geek- and could do that in my sleep. But I got transferred into another department after nearly 2 years in that sector.

So now I've moved into Liams sector of murderers and rapists - I'm a little out of my comfort zone. But I've been in this sector for 3 months I'm kind of getting the hang of it. It just takes time I guess.

I'm sat eating a cheese sandwich when two official looking men approach my desk and ask for me by name.  
"Niall Horan?"  
"Ye'sh" I mumble through the cheese in my mouth.  
"Can you come with us please" he asks formally and I feel my heart sink. I've arrested over 100 people. I know how it goes. But why am I being arrested? What have I done?

"H-have I done s-something wrong?" I mumble and I can feel my heart rate increasing as I'm stood up with my hands cuffed behind my back, the metal catching against my wrists making a sharp stabbing pain.

"Niall Horan, I am arresting you on suspicion of  treason by account of the government. You do not have to say anything but it may harm your defence, if you do not mention something you may later rely on in court. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you do say may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult with a lawyer and have that lawyer present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be appointed for you if you so desire. Do you understand?"

"No- yes? I I haven't done anything" I mumble and I can feel tears fall down my cheeks as on-goers in the office stare at me in disgust and anger. They don't know me. They don't know what I've done and haven't done. I don't even know what I've apparently done!

"L-liam-" I whimper.  
"-I'll get a lawyer to met you there Niall" he smiles gently but I can see the shock on his face. I nod as a thank you as I'm taken away and put into the back of a police car.

The drive is silent baring my sniffles. I'm not used to being in this part of the car and it's distracting having to look at the back of the passenger head rest whilst I'm being driven to the police station. Normally I am driven to the police station but by Liam.

 

Not two official officers who think I'm guilty of treason. I've never stole anything in my life! I've never taken anything that wasn't mine. Or done anything I wasn't supposed to at work!

I'm taken to one of their cold metal interrogation rooms with an oak table in the middle of it and two chairs facing eachother. I'm sat opposite what looks like a mirror but I know there are people on the other side of the glass, watching me. Judging me. Observing me. Making notes on my posture. My facial expressions. My mood and the atmosphere. They're building a case to prove I fit the profile of whatever treason case was committed.

I stare at the people behind the glass. Tears steaming down my face, throat so tight I'm struggling to breathe never mind swallow and hands still bound behind me. Sat here, like a criminal.

"Sorry for keeping you Mr Horan. I'm DCI Jones and I'll be leading this investigation. Would you like some water?" A lady says curtly as she enters the room. She slides a cup of water over to me and has a sip of her own. She sits down opposite me and starts looking through the file notes.  
"W-why am I here?" I stutter.

"Just a formality. We have evidence to suggest you could be part of a serious breach of data protection from the US government. We need to follow up all leads. You understand right?" She smiles tightly. I can see it on her face. In her eyes. She's a liar. She thinks I'm guilty and is here to convict me for the charges.

"Would you like a drink?" She tries again and I motion that my hands are still bound behind me.  
She apologises and unties my hands, which I'm actually greatful for, even if her apology was fake. But my hands are killing me so I'm greatful for the relief.

"I'll give you my DNA I have nothing to hide" I tell her as she motions for me to get a drink. She wants my DNA from the cup. All she had to do was ask and I'd give her it. I do have a drink though as I'm pretty thirsty. I take small sips so I know I'll be able to swallow the water with my tight throat.

"Just waiting for your lawyer and we can begin" she smiles at me but it's far from friendly. Her eyes are cold and icy green. Piercing right through my skull and into my brain as though she knows all of my secrets.

"Sorry for the delay. Hello Niall, I'm Emma Drinkworth- I'll be your lawyer" a smart lady with a blue dress and heels says as someone brings her a chair in for her to sit on. She sits down next to me with her own note pad and blue pen.

"Do you require time alone to discuss the position?" Ms. Jones asks in an unimpressed tone.

Emma looks at me and asks if I would.  
"I- I don't know- um- what I'm being charged with" I stutter. Avoiding everyone's gaze in favour for looking at my hands on my knee.  
"Not yet. We'll let you know when we require a break" Emma states and writes something down on the paper.

"So. According to the head of data analysis and protection, you're a very intelligent individual. Highly skilled on computers and a natural in the technology environment. He's singing your praises in this report. Saying you're the best new employee he's ever trained. Fast learner. Knowledgeable. Willing to put the hours in without complaint. We know why now, don't we?" She reels off and I freeze.

"I-I like my job" I stutter, tears gathering in my eyes once more. I know where this is going. I've seen Liam give this speach hundreds of times. I've given this speach hundreds of times.

"So. Here's what I think. I think you became a cop for the badge and the glory. The status seemed too good to pass up-"

"- No. No that's not right-" I object but she cuts me off.

"-But the pay wasn't as good as you thought it would be. So you stole classified information from the government for extortion of money. Don't deny it. We have evidence of the money having been in your bank account. Until you moved it to an off shore account that is" she snaps.

"I-I haven't had any money in my account-"

"-Here are bank statements from the 13th September proving you had 1.6 Billion US Dollars in your account before transferring it out" she snaps.

She looks through the red file for the bank statement and just before she hands it over I tell her my card was stolen.

"My card was stolen"  
"How convenient. Did you report it?" She rolls her eyes, not even pretending to believe me.  
"Yes. I t-told Detective Laura Jones. My head of de-department and she said- um- she'd look into it f-for me. I- I have emails to prove it" I mumble, picking at a bit of loose skin on the side of my nail.

"We'll need access to your email account" she snaps and I nod.

She slides over the paper and I write down my email address and password for her. She doesn't need the password as they can hack into it anyway. But I want to show I'm being co-operative and not being obstructive in any way.

"When was the card reported stolen Niall?" Emma asks softly.  
"I noticed it gone on- um- the 12th September. I c-couldn't pay for my lunch" I mumble, remembering how traumatic it was with me standing in Tesco unable to buy my sandwich as I didn't have my card. Everyone staring at me like I was a poor man with nothing. Looking at me like I was dirt. I was mortified. And starving.

"I reported it-it when I got back to w-work" I finish.

"And did you notice it gone before then?" Emma prompts.  
"No. Last time I u-used it was 5th or 6th S-september for some um- shampoo from Tesco" I sigh. If I'd been more observant I would be able to prove I didn't do it. I'd have noticed the moment it went missing. But now there's a weeks window where my card could have been stolen before it was used for the money fraud.

"Why would I transfer it into my own account?" I mumble.  
"Niall. Don't say anything. We'd like a break" Emma says curtly.  
"No. No we wouldn't. Why would I? Why would I transfer a billion pounds into my own account?" I mutter.

"1.6 Billion pounds. And so you have the money" Ms. Jones says bluntly.

"But you read the report. The one saying that- that I'm intelligent and knowledgeable. Why would I transfer it into my own personal account that's easy to trace? I wouldn't do that!" I argue.

"Niall. I'm advising you not to say anything right now" Emma scolds me lightly.  
"It makes  no sense! I'm being set up!" I cry but it falls on death ears.

 

 

It doesn't take long for them to convict me. The fact the money was in my account and then moved means I must have done it apparently.

 

 

"If you tell us where the money is, it could lessen your sentence"  Ms. Jones tells me during an other interview.

"I don't know where the money is" I tell her for literally the 112th time. I've counted.

 

_____

 

"Niall Horan. For the sake of humanity and the acts of dishonesty you have presented in deceiving your own team, I have no choice but to question your morals. The fact you have been able to manipulate and steal classified information from US government officials for your own personal gain for 3 years without being detected, has shown you in a sly and cunning light as well as highlighted your intelligence within the sector. Based on these facts, I have no choice but to sentence you to 10 years imprisonment without the possibility of bail or an appeal. Take him down."

"No- please- I didn't do anything! You can't- You can't do this. Liam? Liam tell them I didn't do it?! Please-" I beg.

"-I'm sorry Niall. It's out of my control"

"But I didn't do anything! I promise. I promise I didn't do it" I beg. It once again falls on death ears and I'm taken down into the below court cells. I'm locked in one of the cold dark cell rooms that has a tiny bed and a toilet with no sink. That makes me cry even more. I can't even wash my hands after I pee.

 

I feel like such a criminal already.


	3. Chapter 3

Niall pov

I'm not sure how long they leave me in the cold grey room with the dingy walls and uneven floor, but it's long enough that I cry my eyes out and ask them over and over for my mum. The wardens on duty just laugh and tell me I'm not going to last a day in real prison. One of them went as far to say I'll be eaten alive. I'm hoping he means that figuratively and not literally. I'd rather not bump into any cannibals in there. No. Scrap that. I'd rather not be in there in the first place.

I don't belong in prison. I haven't done anything wrong.

I've never stole a penny in my life! Even when my mum sent me to the shop for some milk or bread, I bought her exactly what she asked for everytime. I gave her every single penny I got back as change, not once did I keep any of it. Not even by accident. I've never borrowed anything and not given it back. I've never cheated on a test or skipped school without a genuine reason. I'm a nerd for sure, but I'm no criminal.

I'm sat with my knees up to my chest and my arms wrapped around my legs, trying to pretend to myself that I'm holding myself together. I'm not. My head is pathetically placed on my knees as I stare at the mucky grey walls with clear signs of damp and questionable stains. My eyes are sore and burning from all the crying I have done. My head is pounding against my skull and my nose is runny but I can't be bothered wiping it again. My throat is dry and my arms are cold and I feel like a criminal and I want to go home and now I'm crying again.

I'm sniffling softly to myself when the warden opens the door and tells me I'm being moved to the male prison for UK citizens.

"Horan. Get up. No funny business" he demands and I stand up on shaky legs before making my way towards him.  
"Arms behind your back" he snaps and I only again lock my wrists behind my back and turn around as instructed.

The cold metal is clasped around my wrists and clicked into place and I wince as it once again catches my skin.  
"Baby" the warden mutters as he drags me by the back of my suit and pulls me out if the door. He's only pulling me with one hand and I go flying and nearly fall over. I'm both greatful and terrified of his strenght. Greatful because he stopped me face planting and terrified because he's dragged me to the van with one arm.

 

 

The drive is long and horrible. The bumps in the road send me flying off of the bony seat and when I land again it jolts my bum and back. I'm sure my butt is bruised.

"We're here. So, I drop you with the prison warden. You call him Jamie. He'll fill your file in with your details and explain the daily routine and you your clothes sorted. He then shows you to your cell and introduces you to your cell mate"

"C-cell mate?" I stutter.  
"Yes princess. Cell mate. You all have one" he mocks me as he leads me into the sign in room.

"Jamie. We have a princess for you here. Niall Horan" he says to Jamie.

Jamie is tall and muscular and absolutely terrifying. He's huge! Easily a boxing- rugby playing man- with 10 years as a bouncer. He has short ginger hair and looks a little like Ed Sheeran. But 7 foot tall and built like a tank.

"Okay Horan. Get these on. You get two pairs of joggers and three tops. They're washed once a week. Get changed then. Any valuables in here" Jamie snaps. He throws me some grey joggers and a grey t shirt and I jump from shock when I catch them. He chucks the spare pairs on a chair.

"All belongings in the box. You get them back when you leave" he smirks. He's read my file and knows I'm not leaving for 10 years. I nod my head sadly and turn out my suit pockets.

I place my wallet in there and my phone. Along with my house key.

"C-can I keep a- um- picture?" I whisper to the floor, too scared to look at either of them.  
"WhereHarry is it" he grumbles.  
"M-my wallet"

He picks up the wallet and flips it open. I glance up at him as he stares at the picture and then removes it from the sleeve.

"This your the kid?" He frowns and looks at me with scepticism as if he thinks I'm about 12.  
"N-no. My nephew" I mumble.  
"Sure" he mutters.

He hands over the picture of me teaching Theo how to drive his toy car. He's satin the giant white and black car I bought him for Christmas and I'm kneeling at the side showing him how to turn the mechanical engine on. We're both smiling and it's one of my favourite pictures because right after it was taken, he told my brother I was his "bestest friend in the whole world".

"Get changed" Jamie repeats and I look around for the changing room. Only to come up blank and be met with evil smirks.  
"No no no no no no. There's no changing room. We have to check you when you're naked to make sure you're not smuggling anything in" Jamie says and I frown. I don't want to be naked in front of two grown men!

"I-I'm not. I promise" I whisper but they just laugh and tell me it's procedure.  
I unbutton then take off my white shirt and and black dress pants until I'm stood in my bright green boxers and white socks.

"Skinny little one aren't you" Jamie mutters and writes something down.  
"Socks off and arms up" he adds after he's jotted some things down.

I take my socks off and he throws them woth the rest of my clothes ready to send back to my mother. I stand with my arms out and he checks I'm not smuggling anything in.

"Okay" he grunts then goes back to whispering to the warden and writing things down. I frown and stand with my hands covering my tummy. I feel so exposed and vulnerable. But I also feel a bit like a clown or a zoo animal. One they keep gawking at and talking about as though I'm not here and I don't have feelings.

"You can get changed. Do you have any allergies?"  
"No" I whisper as I pull on my joggers then pull the boring t-shirt over my head.  
"Any medical conditions?"  
"My left knee dislocates. I- um- I have contact lenses" I mumble.  
"How bads your eye sight?"  
"-5.75" I inform him.  
"So you're blind without them?" He mutters and I tell him 'Yeah pretty much'.

"Based on the severity of your eye sight sight you can have the contacts inside with you. Any miss-use of them and I won't hesitate to make you carry out the rest of the sentence blind" he warns and I nod with a timid 'thank you'.

He makes a note of my prescription and says the monthly fees will be charged to the bill I will receive when I'm released.

"Here's a copy of your schedule. Sit there whilst I sign you off" he mutters, hands me a piece of paper and all but throws me onto a chair.

I frown when I get a paper cut and suck the metallic blood off of my finger as I examine my time table for the next ten years of my life.

8AM - 8:30AM            BREAKFAST  
8:30AM - 10:30AM    MORNING CHORES  
10:30AM - 11:30AM  CELL  
11:30AM - 12:00AM  OUTSIDE  
12:00PM - 12:45PM  LUNCH  
12:45PM - 1:00PM    CLEAR UP  
1:00PM - 3:30PM      CELL  
3:30PM - 5:00PM      AFTERNOON CHORES  
5:00PM - 5:45            DINNER  
5:45 - 6:00PM            CLEAR UP  
6:00PM - 7:00PM      SHOWER  
7:00PM - 10:30PM    CELL  
10:30PM                     LIGHTS OUT

"what's- cell?" I mumble.

"That's where you stay in your cell. You can go to another cell on your corridor if you want to but no further than that. Guards will be monitoring you at all times and no door is to be closed during this time" Jamie tells me with a monotone voice. He's been doing this job too long.

"D-do I. Do we- all shower um- t-together?" I whisper, very afraid of the answer.

"No. You'll go in groups of 8 - as there are 8 shower heads - and get five minutes under the shower. It's blocked out for an hour because we grab one batch of you and then take you back while the next batch is showering" he explains. I get five minutes to shower?! That's insane!

"Will- will we be monitored?"  
"You're always monitored princess. It's prison not a hotel" he snaps and I bite my tongue from any more questions I feel the need to ask.

"Let's take you to meet your roomie" he chuckles. He waves the warden off and leads me down a corridor towards the prison.

There are rooms on each side with big steal doors at the front of each one. We turn left. Then right. Then left. Then left again.

"This is your corridor. 7F" he mutters. I make a mental note of it.

"7 is the corridor number. F is the room number" he tells me and stops in front of a door with a giant F on it.

"Styles. This is your roomie. Play nice" is all Jamie says as he introduces me to 'Styles'.

He's laid on his bed with an unamuzed look on his face. He has piercing green eyes and a smirk that makes me, weak at the knees, slightly hard and fearing for my life - All at the same time. He stares me up and down, assessing me with his wondering eyes, but he doesn't move or say anything. I just stay stood still. Frozen. Trying to not cry or wet myself or beg for my mum again.

"Hm" is all he says before going back to the book he's reading. It's very out of place in his giant hands. Everything about him screams 'badass mother fucker in a biker gang with my own rifle and shotgun'. Yet he's reading?

"Stop staring at me" he says off handedly. They way he said it sounds like a request but the way he's looking at me, tells me it wasn't.  
"S-sorry" I mumble. Do not cry.

I make my way inside the small room and notice we have a bunk bed. He's called bottom bunk as he's laid on it and I have no intentions of fighting him for it. We have a toilet. That's it. There isn't even a door or a sink to the toilet. It's literally a toilet in the corner of the room.

I sniff to myself and look at the floor before climbing up the ladder and curling up into a little ball on my bed.

"Stop crying blondie" he mutters and I didn't realise I was.  
"S-sorry" I whisper again and try to be quieter. The last thing I need is for my room mate to beat me up with in 10 minutes of me being here.

"Why are you crying?" He sighs and I can tell he's irritated.  
"There i-isn't even a-a sink" I whimper and hicchup to myself. I'm such a criminal. I'm such an animal. Dirty and pathetic and unhygenic.  
"Is- is that worth crying over?" He sighs and I can hear the frown in his voice.

He stands up and chucks his book on the bed before resting his arms on my bed and his chin on his arms. He must be around 6 feet tall to be able to do that with out stretching on his tip toes.

"I don't be-belong here" I mutter and wipe my eyes. It doesn't help. The tears just keep falling.  
"Everyone says that. But I actually think you're right. I don't think you belong here. What you in for?" He says casually.

He climbs up the ladder and sits on my bed, back against the wall and 5 foot long legs crossed. I don't object for fear of being beat up or worse.

"Treason. They- they think I stole 1.6 Billion US dollars. Um- from the government"  
"Wholly shit! You better share that with me" he laughs, eyes wide with shock when I mentioned the amount of money.

"I didn't. I didn't steal it. I was s-set up. Never stole a- a um- thing in my l-life" I tell him honestly and he nods a little.  
"Yeah I actually believe that. You're too innocent. How long did you get?"  
"10 years. No bail. No appeal" I mutter and his mood drops at the same time his shoulders do.

"Jesus. They really threw the book at you"  
"What are- what are you in- um for?" I stutter, unaware if I'm allowed to talk to him and ask him questions.  
"Murder. I killed my dad and his bit on the side" he shrugs and my heart clenches and my stomache tightens. I'm 2 feet away from a murderer.

"I got 7 years no bail but they added an extra 2 years, 'cos I keep fighting" he laughs like it's a hilarious joke. I don't think it's funny.

"Um- o-okay"  
"Look. He was cheating on my mum. He deserved it" he shrugs like it's no big deal. When my dad cheated on my mum I just called him a rubbish and selfish husband. I didn't kill him.  
"How- what did you use?" I whisper even though I really don't want (or need) to know.  
"My hands" he shrugs and my blood runs cold.  
"O-h? That's- that's nice" I stutter and he laughs before asking me how old I am.

"You must be barely out of your teens"  
"20" I whisper.  
"Hmmm. I'm 25" he grins and I'm not sure why he's grinning at me like that but I don't like it.  
"W-why don't we g-get a sink?"

"That's really bugging you huh? Someone drowned themselves in the sink in their room so we can't have them in case one of us does the same" he starts with a chuckle but then answers my question with far away look on his face.

"Fuck" I mutter.  
"Yeah. He was a nice guy too. Little quiet but not a bad lad" he sighs and I can tell he was affected by the death. Even if it was only slightly. It affected him.

"Well. I'm out. See you round kiddo. I'm Harry by the way" he smirks before jumping down off my bed and on to the floor. He the strolls out of the room and down the corridor.

He's not the best room mate. I mean he's literally just let me on my own. But he isn't the worst. Ie. He hasn't battered me. I curl up tighter and let sleep take over.

 

 

"Shut up. If he wakes up and starts blubbing again, I'll batter you" Harry mutters to someone, which is what makes me wake up. Whoever he's talking to, isn't very quiet. AT ALL. He's loud and boisterous and his laugh is like a high pitched cackle. I sigh and rub my eye gently before opening them to see what's going on.

I nearly jump out of my skin when I open my eyes and there is a man stood with his face, literally 5 inches from mine, and he's staring at me.

"Awe! He's dinky!" Mr high pitched staring man squeals and I feel a bit like a child being cooed at for being adorable.

"Leave him Louis" Harry mutters and Louis makes to protest but stops when he's sees the glare Harry gives him. Louis makes a show of rolling his eyes at me but does leave me be and joins Harry on his bed.

"We're playing 21, if you wanna join, blondie" Harry mutters and I can hear a deck of cards being shuffled.  
"I- I don't know- um- how to play that" I stutter. I don't want to he rude and say no because they're going out of their way to include me and make me feel not alone. So I want to be polite and acknowledge that. But I've never even heard of 21. Never mind played it.

"Come down and I'll show you" he adds. I sigh quietly to myself before crawling to the edge of the bed and climbing down the ladder. I perch on the edge of Harry's bed and he deals me into the game.

"You can get comfy" Louis laughs and I blush before moving so I'm sitting a little more on the bed and less on the edge. Harry is sat against the wall at the top of the bed with his pillow behind his back and his long legs spread out over Louis legs. Louis is sat against the side of the wall with his legs also spread out but under Harry's legs.

"So I deal us all two cards each. On your turn you can pick up a mystery one or say stick and not pick one up. The aim is to get as close to 21 as you can without going over it. But if you get more than 21, it's a bust and you automatically loose" Harry briefly explains.

"O-okay" I mumble and pick up my cards.

I have the 8 of hearts and 5 of diamonds. 13. Hmmm.

"So, hit or stick?" Harry asks and I bite my lip before whispering "hit"

He nods towards the pack of cards in the middle and I pick one up before turning it over.

8 of spades.

That's 21 right?

"I h-have 21" I whisper and Louis looks at me bewildered whilst Harry laughs and checks my cards.  
"Well done blondie. Louis deal"  
"What's your real name?" Louis asks me as he collects the scattered cards and then shuffles them.  
"Niall"  
"Like the river?" Harry frowns and it only just occurs to me that I never told him my name.  
"Yeah- but. But spelt N I A L L. But it's pronounced like the river Nile"

"Ahhh. Cute" Louis smirks and he and Harry share look that makes me nervous and anxious.

"You should meet Zee.  He's a laugh. The silent broody type. You'd get on great with him. He's my roomie" Louis tells me and Harry motions for him to go get 'Zee'. He rolls his eyes once again and makes a show of getting up and leaving the room.

Harry shuffles the cards whilst we wait.

He comes back in a moment later with a hot Mexican man woth a chizzled jaw line, perfectly sculpted cheek bones and eye lasts I can see from 10 feet away.

"Niall this is Zayn. Zayn this is Niall, Harry's roomie" Louis introduces us and steps to the side so we can 'meet'.

"Yeah. We've met" Zayn snaps and I frown. Have we? I don't remember meeting him. He surely must have me mistaken for someone else-

 

"-He's the cop that put me in here"

 

 

Ah.

The arsonist.

Now I remember.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay - but this chapter is long so hopefully that makes up for it!!

Niall pov

"Niall. Tell me you aren't a Fed" Harry mutters quietly to the floor. I don't look at him. Or Louis. Or Zayn. I look at the floor. I'm dead. I’m literally so fucking dead it’s almost funny. I can't lie to him because if I do, I'm dead. But if I tell him the truth I'm equally as dead. And these aren't the kind of people to make death quick or painless.

"Niall! Tell me. You aren't. A Fed" he repeats with a growl and I whimper to myself. I wrap my arms around myself further to shield myself or make myself less cold or scared. I don’t know. But it doesn’t work. I’m just as cold and I’m just as scared and I want my mum!

"I- I’m not- a- a Fed" I whisper. Technically I'm not anymore, since my chief constable fired me when I was arrested. Meaning all my hard work was for nothing. All of the early mornings to physically train to pass my physical exam was for nothing. All of the written exams and eating healthy and learning my Miranda rights – was for nothing!

"Are you lying to me?" He says simply, his eyes locked on mine and I look at the floor, shaking with fear.

"Look at me" he snaps and I jump a little from shock of how deep and demanding his voice is. He sounds so powerful and authoritive, I can’t help but look at him. Even though it is through fearful eyes. He raises his eyebrow to prompt my response.  
"I- I was. Um- a Fed. They f-fired me" I mumble.  
"When you go arrested?" He guesses, arms folded over his muscle covered chest.  
I take a deep breath, look him straight in the eyes and I nod softly.

“He's dead!-" Zayn snarls and makes his way over to me with pure rage and I move as far back as I can to get away from him. Due to the small room I only manage to get a further 2 feet away from him before my back hits a wall.  
"- Leave him Malik." Harry mutters with a lazy arm wave and Zayn stops in his tracks with a bewildered look on his face.

That's interesting. Harry didn't snap or shout or try to stop Zayn physically, he simply told Zayn to stop and he listened. He didn't look particularly pleased or amused with it, but he did stop. Harry must be the Alpha. I wonder if that makes Louis and Zayn the Betas. So then who’s t Omega?

"He's a Fed!" Louis snaps and gestures towards me with an angry wrist shake. I flinch again, tears gathering in my eyes. I keep telling myself not to cry. But the more seconds that pass, the harder it is to keep the tears at bay.

" He's a baby. He won’t last five minutes in here with everyone else. You want to add more time to your sentence by beating the shit out of him, go ahead. But you've only got three years left. Heck we all have. You beat him up, they'll double that" Harry reasons. He plonks himself down on his bed appearing un-interested in the situation as he picks his book up again and flicks through it for his page.

"So I'm supposed to just leave him to get away with shopping me!?" Zayn scoffs.

“You’re supposed to be smart about it, Malik. He’ll get what he deserves. That doesn't mean you have to be the one to do it"  
"True. Good luck kid" Zayn mutters, shoves me backwards into the wall and then storms out of the room with an evil grin. Something tells me he won't wait or hesitate to tell everyone I'm a Fed.

“You’d be better off dead, blondie" Louis cackles and flops down on Harry's bed before laying his head on Harry’s legs and appearing to fall asleep.

I don’t care that Harry and Louis are sat right there, I slide down the wall, curl up into a ball and cry.

I don't want to be beaten up anymore. or raped by Justin. Or knifed in the thigh. Or stoned or what ever else there is! I don't want to pee in a toilet 3 foot away from my room mates head and not even be able to wash my hands afterwards. I don't want to shower naked with 7 other men in under 5 minutes whilst being ‘monitored’ ie. Perved on by the wardens. I don’t want to serve a 10 year life sentence for a crime I didn't even commit. I haven't done anything! Why didn't Liam fight harder to help me!? Why didn't my boss show them the emails about my bank card being stolen?! Why the fuck am I left to rot in this god forsaken hell hole! I don’t deserve to be here. I want my mum!

"Blondie. Breathe" I hear someone mutter.

I try to open my eyes and see who my murderer will be but I can't see them from the tears that are rolling down my face and stinging my eyes. Once again my throat is tight and my head is sore and I can't breathe properly and why isn't there any air-

"Horan. Seriously. You’re gonna pass out. Breathe" the voice mutters again and I shake my head to tell him I can’t.

"Niall. It's Harry. For fucks sake. Breathe" he mutters and shakes my shoulders slightly. That tactic doesn't usually work but for some reason, it seems to snap me out of my panic attack.

He shakes me a little harder and I look up at him through bleary eyes. He looks almost kind for a moment before his eyes firm up and he turns back nasty.  
"If you’re gonna cry like a baby. Go somewhere else" he mutters before walking back to his bunk.

I nod quietly to myself and wait for my breathing to restore back to normal before standing up and climbing up into my bunk.

Harry pov

Niall has been here a week.

Still, that's longer than any of us thought he’d last. Especially since all he does is cry.

 

I remember showing him where the food hall is. Okay, I didn’t go out of my way to personally show him. I was walking down with Louis and Zayn and told blondie to follow me since he hadn’t eaten since arriving (3 days ago). He climbed out of bed on shaking legs and looked like he'd collapse any moment.

He didn't. Luckily.

We walked down the hallway towards the food hall. Zayn, Louis and myself at the front talking about random shit and Niall trailing behind. But before going in I stopped him.

"Look at me. I’m trying to help you, so I seriously suggest you listen and do as I say" I warned him. He looked up at me with fearful blue eyes and I could see he didn't have any energy to do anything other than listen. He was barely standing for Christ sake.

"Harry? Leave him" Zayn snapped and I remember rolling my eyes at him.  
"How about no. Go in. I’ll be in, in a sec" I replied with a dismissive hand wave. Zayn and Louis looked at me with a glare and I gave them a sarcastic smile with a little hand wave goodbye.

"Okay. You’re a new face but believe me when I say you need to blend in. Do not draw any attention to yourself. Because if you do, they will analyse your face. They will dig into you and your life and if any of them find out what you were- you will wish you were dead. As soon as one finds out, it will spread like wild fire and within an hour everyone will know." I warned him.

"The probably already know. From Zayn" he muttered and I shook my head.  
"I made sure he didn't tell them. That's why he's pissed at me" I sighed. It wasn’t worth the hassle I got for defending him but, I have my own personal reasons for helping him.  
"Wh- why would you help me?" He stuttered.

"Because you’re not a bad room mate. I don't want you to get moved and then I get lumped with a dickhead to share with." I grunted at him. It was half a lie. As far as room mates go, he’s not bad. Sure he cries too much and only pees when he thinks I’m asleep but that’s not bad exactly. But I don’t want him to think that I'm a nice or that I’m helping him. I have a reputation to maintain. But, on the other hand, if I don’t, help him, he won’t last 5 minutes in here. He's too pure. Too innocent.

"H-how do I blend in?"

"Be confident. Keep your shoulders firm and your head high. Don't look nervous" I told him before making my way inside.

I grab an apple and some cornflakes before joining Louis and Zayn at our table.

"I don't know why you're helping him"  
"Because he’s just a kid Zayn" I lied. Only partly though. He is a kid. And that part was true.  
"That doesn't mean he’s your responsibility" Louis muttered through his coco pops.  
"No it doesn't. But who else would help him in here? I have my reasons" I snapped. Ending the conversation.

Niall walked in a few moments later, shoulders firm and head up but I could see the fear on his face from where I was sat. I could practically smell it on him. Shit.

He grabbed an apple and some toast before stopping for a second to evaluate his table choices. He started making his way to an empty table when Justin called him over. Double shit. I remember being literally on the edge of my seat. Waiting to dive over 6 tables and save him.

"Hey cutie! Come over here. Sit with me if you want" Justin waved Niall over and he smiled a little before sitting down in the lions den.

"Well. He's a lost cause" Louis frowns.  
"He isn’t" I muttered with an eye roll. We watched Justin’s hands and Nialls face intently. Justin’s hand stopped on Nialls thigh and I remember being livid as I analysed Nialls terrified and uncomfortable face as he nibbled his apple.

"I need him out of there" I mutter to myself.  
"Harry. If Justin wants Niall, he’ll get him" Louis sighed.  
"Even I feel sorry for the kid" Zayn added and my stomache sank.

I watched Justin’s hand slide further up Nialls thigh before he was grabbing Nialls crotch. Niall shuffled slightly and I saw him ask Justin to stop with a whisper. Bad move. I closed my eyes briefly to take a deep breath before exhaling and opening my eyes to witness Justin’s rage.

Justin grabbed Niall by his hair and threw him off of the seat backwards, causing Niall to land on his back and whack the side of his head on the tiled floor. I stood up and jogged over to him to help, as Justin was shouting about how he's "dead" and "everyone better hurt this little bitch".

"Justin. Leave him" I snapped as I helped Niall stand up. I really didn't need the aggravation. Especially since I haven’t been in trouble for the last 2 years.  
"Awe. That's why he won't put out. You're putting in" he laughed.

"Yeah. Anyone else got a problem with that!" I snapped and gazed around the room. It was a bare faced lie but it was the only way to help Niall. No one spoke or answered or even met my gaze. I looked back at Justin who backed down.

"He's a Fed. He arrested me" someone shouted and I closed my eyes to prepare for the uproar that I knew would come from this.

"Kill him-"  
"-shoot him-"  
"-Let Justin rape him-"  
"-let me rape him-"  
"-Let’s play stones blondie-"  
"-Suck my dick-"  
" – I'm going to kill him-"  
"- I'll batter you up-"

"Shut up" I snapped at everyone in the room. I made my voice go voluntarily deep to assert my dominance and prove authority. It usually works and I didn’t shock me that it worked this time.

They went silent immediately.

"Yes. He’s an ex Fed. Yes I'm fucking him. No. No one else is to touch him. If I find out any of you have hurt him, or touched him, or even taken his food off him. You're dead. I will personally snap your necks with my bare hands and I won't think twice about doing more time for it. Justin. You touch him again, you’ll wish you were dead" I warned everyone and dragged Niall over to where Louis and Zayn were sat gawking at me. He stumbled slightly and nearly fell but I had a firm grip on his jumper so he didn't face plant the floor.

"T-thank you" Niall whispered.  
"That was for Gamma. Now we're even" I muttered quietly so only he could hear me.

"G-gemma?"  
"You talked her down from committing suicide a year ago. She's my sister" I whispered, looking at my hands. I hate talking about my family. Especially in here. 

Louis and Zayn gave me weird looks as if they wanted to know what I was saying. But I didn’t tell them. It’s personal and they didn’t need to know. We're friends but only because Louis gets me gear and Zayn isn’t knobhead.

"Y-yeah. I remember. She’s a lovely girl" he hummed softly and offered me a little smile.  
"We're even" I repeat and he nodded again.

I gave him my apple as his food was left on the table with Justin and I don’t blame him for not wanting to go get it. We’re all in here for a reason. But Justin- and the things he’s done- he makes even my skin crawl. And I've murdered two people (that the cops know about) with my bare hands.

 

 

So Niall has been here a week.

All he does is cry and sleep. He doesn’t go for breakfast anymore. Choosing to only go for either lunch or dinner. So one meal a day. And then he leaves his room to shower. That’s it. He doesn’t leave his bed unless he has to. He’s already lost a ridiculous amount of weight and he didn’t have that much to start with. A bit of baby fat but that was it. He’s pretty much skin and bone. But as weak and innocent as he is, he’s stubborn. So I leave him to it.

Showering was funny at first but now it’s just sad.

We down in our joggers and shirts, strip down and throw our clothes on a bench, shower and go back to the room in our towels with our clothes in our arms.

Niall goes down in joggers and a shirt, strips down to his boxers and showers in them. He barely moves his arms, choosing to keep them over his stomache and man-hood. Then wraps the towel around him. Once back in our room, he takes his boxers off under the towel and hangs them over his bed frame to dry, before pulling some joggers on. Even though it’s only me and him in the room. He’s so insecure it’s unreal. But I try not to stare. I don’t want to make him paranoid or feel any more uncomfortable than he already is (not that that’s possible).

 

 

He’s been beaten up 4 times in the last week.

Once in the shower when I wasn’t there as I was in a different group. Once in the food hall because the other man wanted his orange juice. Once in the food hall because he ‘had the cheek to go into the food hall and get food' and once in the corridor on his way back to our room.

So at present, he has a bust nose, a black eye, a split lip, 4 broken fingers on his left hand, 2 cracked ribs, bruised kidneys, a large cut on his thigh from a knife and a crushed foot where someone intentionally stomped on it. Oh, and he’s also been groped God knows how many times.

I’m laid in bed reading Marley and Me when Niall limps into the room once again. I’m used to it by now, so as usual, I don’t look up, but I do when I hear him whimper loudly.

I glance up and see him barely standing and looking like he’s about to pass out. He has a large gash on his forehead that’s bleeding pretty bad over the right side of his face. What the- that wasn't there an hour ago when he left for his weekly weight check. Who's done this?!

"What happened?" I sigh. I abandon my book on my bed and stand up before grabbing his arm to steady him, when he starts swaying.  
"J-Justin wanted me to- to blow him. I said no and he cracked my head against the wall" he mumbles.

I sigh softly before sitting him down on my bed.

"Wait here, okay? Don't move" I tell him softly before heading out to find a guard. His head needs seeing to. He could have internal bleeding for Christ sake.

"Hey! Chris! One of the guys is hurt. It’s his head. He's bleeding pretty bad" I tell Chris when I catch up to him.  
"Where is he?" He asks urgently and I lead him back to my room.

When we get back to the room, Niall has been sick on the floor and there's blood in it, which is never a good sign. But he’s also slumped on the floor in a pile, not really speech coherent.

"Shit- Harry. Radio Jamie. Tell him what’s happened" he tells me and chucks me his pager.

I press 9 and call Jamie then tell him the situation whilst Chris keeps Niall conscious (barely).

 

Luckily a crash team is on hand and two paramedics come into the room, lead by Jamie, less than a minute later.

"Harry? Can you leave us to it? I’ll keep you updated. Thank you for your help" Jamie smiles and I nod before going to Louis room, silently praying that blondie makes it. I may be tough and I may be a murderer, but I have a heart and blondie? He doesn’t deserve any of this.

 

 

It’s three long, agonisingly quiet, days later when Niall is discharged back to us. He limps in to our room whilst me, Louis and Zayn are sprawled out playing poker on my bed.

"Hey blondie. Feeling better?" I smile.  
"Yeah- much better. T-thank you for getting help" he smiles with a little blush.  
"An eye for an eye and all that" I smile.  
"We’re playing poker if you wanna join" Zayn offers Niall and he looks as shocked as I feel, but declines saying he’s rather tired. He looks done in to be fair. He climbs carefully up the ladder and curls up on his bed, and less than a minute later I can hear soft breathing and know he's asleep. I smile softly to myself and Louis looks at me with a knowing – shit eating – grin. I punch him hard in the arm and make Zayn deal another hand.

 

"Harry?" Niall calls softly through breakfast. I made him come with us to build his strength up and let him sit with us so no one could hurt him.

I look at him whilst eating my Apple and motion for him to continue by waving my fingers slightly.  
"I was- wondering if you’d-"

"-Let me guess. You’re going to ask me for a favour" I mumble through my mouthful of apple and he nods slightly with a blush. I continue.  
"You’re going to ask me to be some form of body guard for you?" I guess.

He nods again with a small sigh.

"And I’m going to say no." I tell him as I put my finger up as a 1 gesture. He frowns then opens his mouth to speak again and I cut him off.

"You’ll offer me money? And I’ll still say no. Don’t need any money in here. You’ll try to appeal to my better nature? And I’ll still say no. Because I don’t have one" I continue. The last part is actually a lie. For some things I have a better nature. A humane side. But for most things? I don’t. There are only a handful of things that make me feel remorse or sadness.

"There is nothing you can offer me, that I want or need. Therefore, my answer is no" I finish.

"Please-"  
"- You asked me a question. And my answer. Is no" I say firmly with a slight growl for emphasis.  
"O-okay" he sighs.

We go back to eating in silence before he pipes up again.

"What if-"  
"-I said no. God damn it" I snap, slamming my fist on the table (which hurts and attracts everyone's attention) and causes Niall to flinch.  
"Hang on. I want to hear his offer" Louis smirks with a wicked grin. Louis is the guy who gets off on doing people favours (mostly drug related) because then he owns the person. He has one up on them and he loves it. He lives the power that comes with being in control of people and being able to black mail them or force them to do whatever he wants. He thrives off of it. Almost like a vampire feeds on human blood, he feeds on human vulnerability and the selfish needs that cause people to make bad choices

“I'll have sex with you. Th- That’s something you don’t -um- have" he mumbles.

"You- you’d pimp yourself out, to avoid being beaten up" I frown. That seems a little eccentric. What a drama queen.

"I- I’m always beat up or- or touched and- and I hate it. I hate being grabbed by o-older men and- and pushed to the floor and- and- and made to touch them" he whimpers and I can see a few tears fall down his rosy little cheeks. My heart clenches and my stomache tightens but I don’t know why. All I know is, i have an over whelming urge to wipe the tears from his face, cuddle him tight into my arms so he’s safe and warm and snap the necks of everyone who’s causing his tears.  
"You’ve touched someone?" I frown.

"Gerry, Justin, L-Logan- um- Dave. They- they cornered m-me and made m-me suck th-them off"

"All of them?" Louis frowns. We’re all frowning. Even Zayn. Meaning it must be bad. Zayn hates Niall but we’ve all grown a little fond of the kid. We all frown even more when Niall nods.  
"One- um- after the other" he stutters.

"What makes you think it will be different you sleeping with Harry?" Zayn mutters.  
" ‘leas’ that’s - on-only one- um- person" he shrugs.

I raise my eye brow at him. I’m not buying it. Okay I am. But I feel like there’s more to this story.

“Better the devil you know, right?” louis shrugs with a laugh. He and Zayn are practically doubled over in hysterics. I don’t find anything about this situation funny.

But I’m considering it. I really am. I mean, I could have sex with literally anyone in here, but, Niall is gorgeous and young and innocent. But I’m not keen on pretty much raping the kid. If he’s doing it for something from me, that’s practically pimping himself out. Meaning it may feel like rape to him and I don’t want that.

"P-please Harry?" He whispers.

"Have you ever had sex with a guy? Scrap that. Have you ever had sex at all" Louis asks.

"I- I had sex with my ex- girlfriend. Um- and- y-yeah I slept with a guy"

"Which guy?" I frown. He’s being really shifty and reserved.

"J- Justin"

"Tell me you didn’t" I mumble, my heart actually breaking for the kid.  
"He- he made me"  
"Did- I’m assuming you bottomed?" Louis prompts and Niall nods, refusing to look any of us in the eyes.

"Did he-"  
"-Louis. Shush. Niall- did- did he prep you and stuff?" I ask quietly, not wanting to scare him but needing to know, for my own peace of mind, that even though the kid was raped- he was prep-ed and slick enough that it didn’t cause him too much physical pain.

"N-no"  
"Did he use lube?" I frown and Niall’s face goes bright red but he shakes his head gently, his fluffy little blonde tufts of hair bouncing as he does.

"So- he fucked a virgin with no prep and no lube?"  
"I w-wasn’t a virgin-"  
"- You were for gay sex" I argue and even though it was a statement and not a question, he nods.

 

No one speaks for a minute.

We’re all silently mulling over what Niall has told us.

I can’t believe Justin raped him and I didn’t even know about it.

I should have known. I saw the way he was touching Niall the first day he was here. Why didn’t I give Justin a firmer warning to stay away from him?!

"I don’t want sex, but I’ll be your bodyguard" I tell him after thinking it through.  
"W-what do you -um- want?"

Good question.

I don’t actually want anything.

I just want you safe.

But I can’t tell you that.

Especially not with Louis and Zayn sat here, listening intently.

"I'll let you know" I smirk at Louis who smirks back at me. He thinks I’m playing his game. The -I’ll do you a deal and collect what's mine when I decide on a worthy reward for my good will towards you- game.

Niall nods softly but offers me a small smile of appreciation, but it’s laced with fear and I feel sick to my stomache.

 

Now I'm the one in control.

There’s just one problem.

The only thing I want, is Niall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is anyone actually reading this?!
> 
> Haha
> 
> Opinions???


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooooo:
> 
> First of all, thank you for reading/ commenting.
> 
> Second of all, I just want to say, I'm not one of these people that wants loads of live and attention. The only reason I asked if anyone was reading, was because I felt a bit stupid writing all this, if no one was. Because that's just awks!
> 
>  
> 
> Opinions?!?

Harry pov

 

"You know Justin's in hospital right?" Louis asks me over breakfast. He raises one eyebrow at me and I shrug.  
"Oh"  
"W-what? Why?" Niall whispers with wide eyes and fear all over his gorgeous little face.  
"Someone strangled him. Not enough to kill him, but enough to make him suffer" Zayn pipes up, looking at me with knowing eyes and a slight smirk.  
"Oh, that's sad" Niall whispers.

"After what he did to you, it's the lease he deserves" I mutter and have a mouthful of porridge.  
"I-it was you?"  
"T'was. I told you I'd look after you" I say firmly but smile at him.  
"I- I didn't- I don't want you to get in trouble" he mumbles softly and I silently coo at his adorable little face. Why's he so cute.

"I won't. I'd like to see them prove it was me" I cackle.

Justin won't be speaking for a while with how tight my hands went around his neck. I strangled him long enough and hard enough that he'd suffer, but not so long the medics couldn't save him. It was amazing. The feeling I got when watching his revolting little body spasm on the floor, begging for air and help but he knew. He knew no one would help him. I could see him reflect on everything he's done so far. But it wasn't enough. He needed to pay for what he's done. Not only to Niall but to all the others.

I've murdered people with my bare hands and if god had to choose one of us to take to heaven, he's choose me. That's the kind of evil that lies in the veins of Justin.

He spasmed on the floor for a while, his body and lungs begging for air. I kicked his shoulder lightly to turn him on to his back and stomped on his ribs. 6 times.

1 was for Niall  
2 was also for Niall  
3 was for Dave  
4 was for Eric  
5 was for Matt  
6 was for Bethany

All victims.

I heard a crunch from under my trainer and knew he'd paid the price. For now.

So I left.

I waved and called by the Justin for the cameras and went back to my bunk.

 

 

"Harry? We need to ask you a few questions regarding Justin. We can do it here if you want" Jamie says calmly as he approaches the table with two federal officers.

"Sure" I shrug.

"He's been assaulted. Left pretty much on deaths door."  
"Oh" I mutter, not pretending in the slightest that I care, then have a sip of my orange juice.

"You don't seem overly upset. Can you shed any light on this?"  
"I didn't like the guy. That's no secret. I'm not going to pretend I feel bad for him" I shrug.

"So you don't feel bad for him?"

"Nope. He got what he deserves. Doesn't mean I did it" I shrug again.  
"So you didn't do it? We have CCTV footage that shows you being the last person leaving Justin's room"  
"So you think it was me?" I guess. Jamie doesn't speak and neither do the cops.  
"You're the lead we're looking into" one of the police men tells me after a moment.

"So you DO think it was me. Prove it" I grin at them with a shit eating smirk. I drink down the rest of my juice, stand up and stretch my arms over my head and start walking out of the room.

"Come on guys. Cards are calling me" I shout to the others. Louis and Zayn snicker and make their way over, Louis grabbing Nialls jumper to pull him with them.

"I'm gonna have a nap I think" Niall yawns once we reach our cell.  
"Okay" Louis shrugs and we all pile on my bunk to play card.

"I need a favour from you both" I say quietly as I shuffle the cards between my hands.

Zayn gives me his undivided attention and gestures for me to continue. Louis motions up to where Niall is laid in bed and I sigh with a nod.  
"He doesn't belong here"  
"I know he doesn't. But breaking him out is obserd. He'll be caught in 5 minutes and that's even if we do gets him out" Louis mutters.

"I'm not breaking him out. I'm proving he didn't steal the money. Then they'll let him out" I shrug.  
"And how are you going to do that?" Louis scoffs.

"Niall sent emails about his bank card being stolen that were deleted and never logged as evidence. Zayn can access them and we can get them pulled together with more proof-"

"-On which computer?" Zayn laughs.  
"You know people. There must be someone you can trust to be your techy- computer guy"

I sigh.  
"Sandy's the best beside me. We graduated IT Masters together. And he's as bent as we are. He just hasn't been caught. But he's not cheap"

"Speak to him. Get him on board and let me know what he wants in return. I'll sort it" I nod and Zayn nods in confirmation that he'll do just that.

"1 flaw Einstein. How are you getting the encrypted emails in the first place?" Louis mutters.  
"Gemma. I'll ask her to get a job in the office and plug the memory stick into the hard drive to copy the emails" I shrug and Zayn nods agreeing that will work.

"I'll get Sandy to send her an encrypted memory stick so all she has to do is plug it in and bring send back" zayn comments and I smile at him. At least someone is on my side.

"How is she getting the job in the first place? They're super strict"

"I can hack into the cop shop computer systems and put her down as a new employee. Okay, I can get Sandy to" Zayn smirks. I love it when a plan comes together.

"You're a genius" I grin and give him a high five.

"Okay. Harry lend me your phone. I'll speak to Sandy and get him on board. So we need to, hack the system to get Gemma in. Get an encrypted memory stick to gemma and then he needs to gather the evidence once the emails are copied? I'll see what he wants in return too" Zayn double checks. I confirm that's what we need and hand him my mobile phone I keep wedged in the basen of the toilet in a plastic bag.

"Okay, so, that's gemma getting the email evidence, zayn sorting the coding and techy stuff. What do you want from me?" Louis asks softly.  
"I need you to find the money" I shrug casually.  
"1.6 Billion US dollars? You want me to 'find it'? It won't be lying under a couch or sat in a local bank account-"

"- No but you can find it. You've done it before. I need you to locate the money but also, I need a record of where the money has been at each stage of it being stolen. If you do that, we can catch who really stole the money and Niall will be released"

"Why are you doing this-"  
"-I have my reasons-" I say off handedly, but he cuts me off.  
"- And if you want my help, you'd better tell me them" Louis snaps.

"Fine. A year ago- things got really bad for Gemma- my sister. She couldn't cope and- she couldn't see any way through the mental health problems she was having. She tried to kill herself" I whisper.

"H-harry I'm sorry. I- I didn't know-"

"-It's fine. Well the situation isn't but- you're fine. Anyway- s-she was ready to jump off -um- London Bridge. She was -up- up on the rafters and preparing to throw herself in. Niall, along- um- with a few other cops s-showed up. Some asked her to come down. Some told her -um- not to do it but- but Niall didn't. He didn't tell her she was being stupid or r-reckless or selfish. He asked her if she was okay. He asked her -um- w-what had happened to make her feel like that. W-what made her feel- feel like she had no other choices. He- he stood talking to her for over 4 hours. Asking about her life and- and trying to help her see she had more to be- more to live for. He said he could recommend counselling or for her to talk to someone i-if she wanted. He stood at the railing with her, and helped her back over. He held her and- and he cuddled her. He went to hospital with her and to the m-mental health clinics with her. He saved her life. But- but he also didn't leave her. He made sure she knew, the whole way through t-the healing process, he was there. He was right there FOR her and WITH her and- made sure she knew- she wasn't alone. He helped her when I couldn't and- and I owe him for that" I whisper and stutter my way through the story. 

No one knows about gemma- okay no one knew about gemma. At all, never mind about this. It's a personal thing and as harsh as it is, it's a vulnerability and weakness that you can't afford to have in here.

"I'm sorry for- that you went through that" Louis mumbles and I know he has 6 younger sibblings. He knows the heartache and how traumatic it would be to find out one of your sibblings has tried to take their own life. 

 

It's even worse being in here.

Because I couldn't help her. If Niall hadn't talked her down, I'd have lost the only sibbling I have. The only family member I have left.

"I'll help you. I'll find the money. I have a friend called Luke- he works in banking. I'll recruit him to help" Louis smiles and I thank him with a head nod and a smile. I can't speak right now. Not after speaking about Gemma. I'll cry if I do. I know I will. And that's something I haven't done in 12 years.

"We'll leave you to it Haz. I'll speak to Luke and we'll get your boy out" he grins and climbs off of my bed. Zayn hands him the phone and they both leave, closing the door on the way out. They know I'm close to a break down and I appreciate them leaving.

I flop sideways on my bed. Not in the slightest having any intentions to cry. I'm just thinking about my life and how I got here.

Thinking about how Derek killed my mum in a house fire when I was 13. Her funeral was the last time I cried. After that I was full of anger. Gemma and I moved into a new home with my dad and his new girlfriend moved in a week later. A week. A week after my mum died. That's when I found out he cheated on mum when they were together. At first I was mad. Livid even and full of rage. 

It swallowed me whole and over took every part of me. I couldn't handle what they'd done to my mum, so I killed them.

I went to the gym to bulk up for a year and I killed them. At 14. The police thought it was a break in and never found any leads so Gemma and I moved into her flat. Just me and her. Things were finally perfect. Things were finally even.

Until 5 years later when gemma was assaulted on her way home from work. I wasn't stupid. I knew I would get time for it. I knew I couldn't get away with murder again, but I didn't care. My sister was raped and he was going to pay.

20 years old, I'd been going to the gym plenty to keep in shape and working there to help pay for rent and food and such. I was in great shape to kill again. So I did.

I found out where he lived and I strangled him in the middle of the night. Only problem was, his wife was there. Well I couldn't leave any witnesses, she had to go. And she did. She didn't even put up a fight. Everything was fine once again. Balance was restored and all that shit. Except then I heard a noise from upstairs, so I went up to see what it was and I found their daughter hiding in the wardrobe. She was 7 years old. That was my downfall. Using the last shred of humanity I had, I closed the wardrobe door and I walked away. I left her alive. Of course she told the police when they came to see what had happened. Of course she picked me out from a line up of people. Of course she testified against me on the stand. There was no evidence though. Just the word of a 7 year old girl. She was my downfall. I've always been a firm believer of cleaning up my own messes and my new found 'hobby' was no different. Until that little girl. I couldn't bring myself to kill her.

Niall reminds me of her in many ways. Mainly the innocence and purity that radiated from her. Niall is the same. Innocent and pure. Maybe he's my new downfall.

I'm so lost in my own thoughts I don't notice Niall stick his head upside down from his bunk and look at me.

"Hi"  
"Jesus! Fuck me. You scared the shit out of me" I shriek.  
"S-sorry" he mumbles with a little frown.  
"I-it's okay. I'm- I'm just thinking about stuff. Not fully with it. Sorry" I apologise and he nods but frowns even more.  
"Wanna talk 'bout it?" He whispers.  
"No thanks. No- I'm good" I smile gently at him.

"D- do you need anything? Or- um- shall I leave you alone?"  
"I'm good Ni. On second thoughts. Get your skinny little arse down here" I decide and motion him down.

He frowns at me from where he's still upside down but tips himself right way round and climbs down the ladders to my bunk.

"Um- what- what do you need?" He stutters and I know he expects me to do something sexual with him or to him. But that's not what I want.  
"Two things. First thing, confidentiality" I reason and he nods, promising he won't tell.

 

"I- I want a c-cuddle" I stutter and I can feel my face grow bright red from embarrassment.

Niall doesn't make me feel stupid or like I'm a nuisance. He beams at me (like an actual beam showing his braced teeth and everything) and crawls into my bunk.

He lays down carefully next to me and cautiously lays his head on my shoulder. I wrap my arm around his skinny little waist and pull him closer until he settles for laying his head and one hand on my chest with his groin pressed against my thigh.

"This is nice" Niall whispers.  
"Yeah. Yeah it is. Shame it won't last" I sigh.  
"I won't tell anyone. I like cuddles too. They make me feel safe"  
"You're laid on a murderers chest. How can that feel safe?" I scoff.  
"I'm not scared of you Harry. You're probably the only person in here I'm not scared of" he hums.

"You should be. I've done things you couldn't even imagine and I don't feel any regret"

"That doesn't make you a bad person. Or scary. It just means- I think you need to find somewhere -legal- to channel your anger and emotions"  
"I don't have emotions. I literally feel nothing" I tell him with a slight laugh. But it's not funny. It's actually sad if you think about it.

"You don't feel anything? Like- happy or sad? Just nothing?"

"I used to feel anger and resentment and now I'm just numb"  
"Maybe we- maybe we could find something that gets you feeling again?" Niall smiles softly.

"S- since my mum was killed, when I was 13- I- I lost feeling o-of pretty much everything. I don't- I don't know what happiness is. I don't know how to feel sad or remorseful. I'm just- I don't even feel angry anymore. I'm done. It's like my body is done fighting. I feel nothing" I whisper.

As I'm speaking, I understand more and more how Gemma must have felt to he able to speak to someone and for them to actually listen. When Niall listens, he doesn't do it to respond. He does it to understand.

"Maybe you- just- just need to focus on you. Maybe- this is your you time. Don't worry about -anyone else- or what - you know- what they'll think or say. Look after yourself. Do it, because you want to, not because they want you to or because you should. Have some you time- to- to think about what you want. What your purpose is. Then you'll discover things you're passionate about- that's a good way to feel things" Niall says quietly as he draws little patterns with his finger, through my shirt and into my chest.

"That's a good start I think" I smile at him and he once again beams at me.

"Niall, there's something else I want, but, you don't have to. You can say no and I'll listen" I mumble and he frowns a little at me but nods that he's listening.

"Can I kiss you?" I ask carefully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awe we got some of Harry's back story!! 
> 
> (And it's good. If I do say so myself!)
> 
>  
> 
> And they're getting Niall out!! (Or trying at least)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay

Harry pov

"Gem, I- um- I need a favour" I whisper to my sister as she's sat across from me in the visiting halls.  
"Are those bruises new?" She changes the subject and strokes her hand lightly over my bruised knuckles.

"No contact" Samson, one of the guards says lightly. We both sigh and pull our hands away from eachother. I miss my sister. I know she's here with me now, but, I miss her. I miss her smiles and her laugh and her warm hugs on cold days. I miss her making me hot chocolates when I'm I'll and singing me to sleep when I had nightmares as a child.

"I-yeah?" I sigh, rubbing my thumb lightly over the black-ish green bruise.

"I thought you promised no more fighting. You're out in three years Harry! I want my little brother home" she argues and I look down out of guilt. I'm trying! I really am! I want to go home more than anything. But I can't and won't leave Niall to be assaulted. So anyone that messes with him, messes with me. Whether it's inmates or guards.

"My new roomie has been getting it rough. I've been trying to look after him" I tell her honestly and her face softens.

"That's good of you" she smiles gently and I can see how much she's aged over the last four years. Her eyes have a few more wrinkles and she looks tired. Like she's mentally exhausted. It makes her look older.

"I- I did it more for you than him" I sigh.  
"What do you mean?"  
"His name is Niall Horan. You might know him better as Detective Horan"  
"H- that name rings a bell- he was the- he saved my life" she whispers and I nod my head, confirming the person is one in the same.

"Is he why you need my help?" She asks after a moment's silence, letting it all sink in.

"Yeah. He doesn't belong here Gem. He's been done for stealing 1.6 Billion US dollars from the government. But he was set up. There's no way he'd have the balls to do anything like that. He doesn't belong here and- I'm trying to get evidence to prove he's innocent, to get him out"

"What can I do?" She smiles.

"Are you sure you don't want to think about this? It could be dangerous" I whisper, suddenly not so keen on the idea of involving my only family member.

"Harry. I'm sure. A life for a life."

 

 

 

Niall has officially been here a month.

He's coping a bit better and not to be vain, but the cuddles definatly help him (and me). And our make our sessions are legendary. Trust me on that.

I haven't told Niall what we're up to. I don't want to get his hopes up if we can't deliver. But I also don't want to put him in more danger. Technically what we're doing is illegal as he was denied an appeal.

"Hey hazza"  
"Hey Ni" I smile as I enter our room. He's sprawled out on his bed with his arms behind his head. I climb up into his bunk and flop down next to him, laying on my side and using my hand to support my head.

"Hi" I whisper, looking down at him. He giggles up at me and whispers "Hi" back.

I lean down and peck his lips softly. He smiles up at me and I kiss him again. Still only little kisses. I lay the arm not supporting my head, over his stomache and hold on to his soft side and rub my thumb over his squishy tummy. I place small pecks on his lips, nose, chin, cheeks and eye lids. I kiss his soft, hairless jaw slowly and then kiss his lips again.

"Hi" I murmer.  
"Hi" he beams, blue eyes twinkling in the light.

"Have you eaten?" I ask gently and he shakes his head.

 

Which leads us to the food court.

Louis and Zayn are opposite us and we're all tucking into a bowls of tomato soup and bread.

"Harry? I found it" Louis smirks at me and I nearly dive over the table and snog his face off. I don't. But I almost do.  
"Seriously? God Lou! You're amazing" I grin.  
"Found what?" Niall asks with a mouthful of bread.  
"Nothing babe"

"You could tell him now-" Zayn starts and I cut him off with a firm glare.

"-hear me out. I have the data. We have everything we need"  
"Except a lawyer that will represent him" Louis comments.

"What are you talking about?" Niall frowns.

"Niall? Who was your lawyer when you got put in here?" I ignore his question and ask my own.

"Emma Drinkworth"

"Do you trust her?" Louis asks.  
"Y-yeah I guess" he shrugs.  
"Is she a good lawyer?" Zayn asks and Niall laughs his reply "well I'm in here aren't I?"

"No. We need a new lawyer. A good one" I say firmly.  
"Could use Becky. She's a great lawyer. And she'd definatly fight for him" Louis smirks.

Of course! Becky was Louis lawyer and has got him off of 123 prison arrests. She's ace. She's perfect.

"Niall? Come back to the bunk babe. We need to talk to you" I say quietly. I'm not stupid. I know there are people listening to all of the conversations, and this is not one that can be had out in the open.

"O-okay" he frowns but stands up and he and Louis head back to my room. Zayn follows 3 minutes later after taking his dish to the sink. I follow 5 minutes after. We can't all go together as that would look suspicious so we go separately. But Niall always goes with one of us. He never goes anywhere alone. I make sure of that.

 

Once back in my room we talk Niall through the operation we've been running.

"So, Zayns Luke friend hacked the system and got my sister Gemma a job at the cop shop. She copied the emails and send the memory stick back for the emails to be filtered. Luke found the emails thathad been lost about your bank card being stolen. And Louis has been working with his mate to track the money. And they've found it. So all we need to do now, is get you a lawyer that will fight to take this to court" I grin.

"N-not that I don't appreciate this, because I do! But- but this is illegal- my appeal was denied.  You guys could get into so much trouble for this! I can't let you do that" Niall says quietly after a moment to think.

"And we can't let you stay here. You don't belong here Niall. You haven't done anything wrong and I'm scared for your safety if you stay here" I argue.  
"I have you guys. Don't I?" He whispers quietly, unsure of himself.

"Yeah, yeah babe, course you do" I sigh.  
"Babe?" Zayn whispers to Louis but I ignore them.  
"What's going to happen in 3 years though? We all get out in 3 years babe. You'll never survive 7 years in here on your own" I sigh and Nialls face drops.

"You'll get into trouble" he mumbles softly.  
"We'll be okay darling" I smile softly.  
"I- I- you can't. I can't let you- any of you- do this. You'll get extra time added on. I can't be the reason you're in here longer" he whispers and I can see tears welling up in his eyes.

"Ni? We want to. Not stay here, obviously. But we want to do this and help you. We're all willing to pay the price"

"You can't-"

"-We can Nialler and we are. We all want to help you. You just need to let us" Louis smiles softly.

"I- I don't know what to say. T-thank you. All of you. Thank you so much"

"You're welcome babe"  
"No worries bro"  
"You're welcome Nialler"

 

"W-where did you find the money?"

"Three guesses" Louis grins and I frown I forgot to ask where he found the money.  
"Um- I- I don't know" Niall hums.

"So, your so called seargent, isn't so squeaky clean-"  
"-Liam? He wouldn't do that-"  
"-He didn't. His wife did. I believe you know her better as DCI Jones" Louis comments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone have any ideas on this!?
> 
> I'm losing my way with this so any help is greatly appreciated.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo, sorry for the day again :(

Harry pov

After telling Niall everything, and convincing him none of us mind getting into trouble for it, he cries. He full on has an emotional breakdown whilst repeatedly thanking us for saving his life.

Zayn rolls his eyes at Nialls dramatics but Louis and I don't. We know he's being serious. We have literally saved his life. There's no way he'd have survived 10 years in here.

Louis and zayn head out to do their chores whilst I bring Niall in for a cuddle.

"Thank you- like seriously- thank you so much" he mumbles into my chest, from where he's practically laid on top of me in my bunk.

"It's no problem babe. I said I'd look after you" I tell him softly.  
"I- I know but- but Harry this is huge. What yoy guys have done for me, I'll never be able to repay you. But- I promise I'll spend my life trying" he says firmly.  
"You don't have to babe-"

"-Yes I do Harry-"  
"- No you don't. We wanted to do this. We wanted to help you. You don't owe us anything darling" I say softly and kiss his cheek, causing him to blush.  
"Thank you" he whispers and kisses my lips softly. I instantly kiss back but don't let it go any further than small pecks. We're both tired and Niall isn't emotionally in the right place to start a make out session.

"We should go do chores babe" I mumble and he nods in agreement. Laundry. Sarcastic yay.

 

 

The ball is officially rolling. 

We have handed the evidence over to Becky who's logged it with the police for them to do their investigation. So it's safe to say, I'm happy. Niall is getting out of here (hopefully) and I'll never see him again. Yeah. Maybe I didn't think this through properly.

But I don't care.

Okay I do. But I guess I care about Nialls happiness and safety over my own. And I can safely say, I honestly don't mind.

Niall doesn't belong here. He needs to get out of here. Yes the cuddles help and the make our sessions are great, but he's too pure to rot in a place so cruel.

I can tell it's affecting him emotionally (he's all over the place) physically (he's lost 3 stone in 2 months) mentally (he's shut down and I suspect he's hurting himself but currently have no proof) sexually (he was raped god knows how many times before I stepped in). He needs to get out of here and be safe. And if never seeing him again is the price I have to pay to secure his safety, sign me the fuck up.

"Hey Nialler. We're off for lunch, come on" Louis mutters from our doorway. I've been in Louis and Zayns room playing poker whilst Niall had a sleep. He needed it. The poor boy never has any energy.

"Oh- um- hi guys" he mutters, popping he head out from under the sheet. He keeps his while body hidden and Louis glances at me as if to say 'I see what you mean'. (I told him about my suspicions. Not to upset Niall or make him feel as though I'm talking about him behind his back, but so Louis can keep an eye on him too - and also tell me if I'm imagining things)

"I'll meet you there. Hurry up with your wank" Zayn laughs and heads off to the food hall. I don't laugh and neither does Louis. I know for a fact he wasn't masturbating. He isn't flushed. He isn't panting or out of breath. His face isn't red. He's pale and shifty and secretive.

 

"I- I'll be there soon" Niall whispers and I shake my head.  
"Nope. Come on" I say firmly. He asked me to protect him and that's what I intend to do.

He sighs and drops is gaze before shuffling slightly under the sheet. He pops up a moment later and slowly climbs down the ladder.

I can clearly see blood on the sleeve of his jumper but decide not to question him just yet. I want him to feel he can talk to me without being forced. I don't want him to hate me for trying to help him. But let' face it, if I back him into a corner, he'll shut down and won't trust me in future. When he's ready, he'll talk to me. Until then, I'll just have to keep an eye on him and his cuts and make sure they don't get infected.

Louis flicks his eyes to the blood stain and I shake my head lightly, signalling for him not to say anything. He nods without questioning me and we head off to get some lunch.

"I don't know how to help him" I complain.  
"You can't unless he wants you to" Louis sighs as we're folding laundry in one of the chore rooms.

"He's hurting himself Lou. I can't let him do that to himself. It's killing me" I frown, throwing the jumper back in the basket. No one keeps them folded anyway. It's a fucking waste of time.  
"Because you like him?"  
"Because I like him" I agree.  
"Have you told him?"

"No. I don't- I don't want him to not go. When he gets the chance to leave here, I want him to go and not look back. I don't want to be the reason he stays" 

"Harry-"

"- You can't tell him. He won't go and- and I can't have that" I warn and he nods softly, confirming he agrees.

"What about you?" He asks a few minutes later, once we've resumed folding clothes.  
"What about me?" I scoff.  
"What will you do?"  
"I'll be here. I'm always here. For another 3 years at least" I sigh.  
"And after that? You could find him, make a go of things-"

"-When he gets out of here, he'll make his new life. He could go back to being a cop or do something new. But, he'll have his own life and a family and kids and- he'll forget all about me. He'll be happy with someone who isn't a serial killer. With someone he can trust"

"He trusts you"

"Yeah. And that's the biggest mistake he'll ever make"  
"I don't believe that. You're a good guy Harry. You've made some bad choices and done some things that seem a bit over the top, but I know you did it to bring honour to your mum in her death. And I know, I know that Niall feels the same way. He knows you did it to defend her. That doesn't make you evil Harry"

"I am evil. I've killed 4 people Louis. And not one of them has caused me to shed a single tear"  
"4? W-who?" He frowns. I don't blame him. People only know about the two. I've never told anyone about the other 2.

"Des, his bit on the side, a man- a man that raped Gemma and his wife because she witnessed the murder"

"Ah. They were the ones with the little girl"  
"My weakness was letting her live" I mutter.

"Yeah. But it was also what kept you sane. The fact you managed to tune into that humane side after being able to do whatever you pleased, shows a lot of strength Harry"

"Strength. Weakness. Same thing" I mutter before turning and leaving to go back to my room.  
"Do you love him?" Louis calls down the corridor.

I stop and ponder the thought before nodding And replying without turning around. "Yeah. Yeah I think I do".  
"Then fight for him"  
"I am. I have" I snap. How dare he stand there and judge me like he knows me. I'm doing all of this for Niall.

"That's why I'm getting him out of here" I add on and turn to face him.  
"Fight to keep him"  
"No. Because then he's tied to this place" I shake my head.  
"If you love him, fight for him"

"It's because I love, him that I'm letting him go" I scowl. I swiftly turn on my heels and go back to my room, slamming the door just as the first year falls. The first tear for 12 years.

I sit against the door for god knows how long. My knees up to my chest in a week attempt to keep myself together. Eye sockets pressed into my knee caps in a vain attempt to stop the tears falling. Arms wrapped so tightly around my ankles I can't feel my hands anymore.

I've never felt so vulnerable. I've never felt so scared. I've never felt so empty. I don't want Niall to go. I really don't. I- I want him here with me. Okay, I don't want him here, but I want him with me.

"Harry? Can you let me in?" Someone calls and I feel the door push slightly against my back.  
"Y-yeah. Sorry" I mutter before quickly standing up. I dust myself off and make my way over to grab my book so I have something to hide my face and occupy my hands.

"So, you'll never guess what?" He grins.  
"What babe?" I whisper, afraid if I speak any louder my voice will crack and give away that I've been crying.

"Becky called. My appeals been granted. The trials booked in for next week! This time next week, I could be out of here Harry!" He grins and runs over to pull me into a bone crushing cuddle. I cuddle back and sway us both lightly and as he hums softly into my chest.

T-That's amazing news babe" I mumble and press a gentle kiss into his soft lips. He kisses back lightly before snuggling into my chest.

"It's all because of you Harry. You made it happen Harry and I'll never forget this" Niall whispers and I make the mistake of looking down into his ocean blue eyes twinkling in the light of the room window.

"Anything for you darling" I say honestly. I would do anything for him. Anything at all. Because I love him. I know I do.

We stand in the middle of the room swaying and humming lightly to eachother for a few minutes before Niall asks if we can talk.

"Can we talk?"  
"Of course" I smile softly and lead us to my bunk where we sit against the wall with a small gap in between us. I think Niall needs space to think so I leave him too it. He does however reach out and hold my hand.

 

"Okay, so. I know you've seen the blood stains and I know you haven't asked me because you're wanting to give me time or space or whatever. Which I really appreciate. I don't know how to start this. Um- I don't know anymore. Um- ever since the rape, I've felt nothing. Literally nothing. I'm not angry or guilty or scared or resentful. I literally don't feel anything and it's terrifying. I don't know how else, to feel something, that's not just numb and empty. I'm angry of course I am But I don't feel it. I'm scared, I really am but again, I don't feel it. I feel nothing and it's scary as fuck to be inside my head when all I am is empty.  So I've been cutting myself. It just started out as little slices, to see if it helped, and it did. So I kept going. And I went deeper and longer so I could feel SOMETHING. I don't want to be this person. I don't want to self harm and slice my skin to ribbons to feel something. But I don't want to feel numb either. I can't do it anymore. I know it's wrong. I know it's addictive and dangerous and I know you're probably disgusted with me-"

"- Hey! I'm not-"

"-But I need this Harry. I need this because I don't know how else to feel. I don't know how else to feel something that's not just numb and empty. I want to be angry. I want to be scared. I want to be resentful but I'm just not and I don't want to feel this helplessness any longer." Niall cries into his hands and I pull him softly so he's crying into my shoulder and I can offer him more comfort and support.

"I won't say I understand babe, because I don't. I've never self harmed before so I won't lie and say I know how it feels. But I know your desire to feel something. I really do. And I know it might not make any difference, but you can talk to me anytime about anything and I'll listen. I promise you. I will listen." I tell him firmly but gently.

"I don't know how to deal with mental pain. Physical pain is easy, a broken arm will heal, A bruise will fade and a fracture will repair itself. Emotional pain is hard. I don't know how to channel my emotions somewhere constructive and not dangerous. But mental pain is the worst. I have no idea how long it will last or if it's even getting any better. I don't know how to deal with mental pain because I can't see it. That's why, the physical pain is easier. I know that when a cut is getting smaller, it's healing. I know when the redness fades, so does the danger. I know when the bleeding stops, so will the pain. That I can deal with. That I can manage" he explains quietly.

 

"Im right here baby. Right here and you can come to me anytime with anything. I promise you baby. You can talk to me" I mumble into his hair. I don't know what else to do or say to make this better. So I just go for cuddling him, kissing his head and telling him I'm here.

"Thank you- for listening and not judging me"  
"Honestly, anytime baby. Anytime at all"

"I sort of lied though" he whispers and bites his lip.  
"Oh? What about?" I frown.

"I do sometimes feel. I feel when I'm with you"  
"I feel when I'm with you too baby"  
"Harry? Make me feel good. Please? I want this" he mumbles and kisses my jaw line slowly before crawling on to my lap and straddling my waist.

He places his hands either side of my head and loops his fingers into my hair before resting his arse into my crotch causing us both to breath out harshly.

"Harry? Touch me. Please" he whispers and reaches down to place my hands on his thighs. He rubs them slightly with my hands before making them explore his chest, hips and back. 

I'm sat in shock as he rubs my hands all over his body and he bites his lip nervously when I don't take action. He thinks I don't want him. He thinks he's done something wrong.

"S-sorry" he whispers and makes to climb off of me, embarrassment evident on his face.  
"Wait! Sorry. I was in shock. Um- are you sure you want this babe?" I ask carefully but hold onto his thighs to stop him moving anywhere.

"More than anything" he smiles and I nod my head with a grin.

 

_____

 

Niall pov

"I just find it ironic. That you're here I mean. Because let's face it, I could have done with you 2 months ago when I got sentenced. I needed you 2 months ago Liam" I whisper to my ex seargent who's sitting across from me in skinny jeans and jumper.

"I'm sorry. It's been manic at the precinct since you, well, you know"

"It's not been easy for me either, Liam. Two months I've been locked up in here like some criminal. I've been made to pee in a toilet with no sink, I've been made to shower with murderers and rapists. I've been beated up and starved. Hell, I was hospitalised 9 times in the first month, alone!" I snap at him.

"As I said, I'm sorry. I should have come sooner" he sighs. He's lying, his nose is twitching.

"As I said, I find it ironic that you're here, now of all times. You know, when they've found the evidence I needed to prove my innocence. When my appeal has been granted for a re-trial"

"You were denied an appeal. 10 years, no bail-" he mutters and I can see the panic start to set in.

"- No appeal. Yes. I was there Liam. I know what was said. But new evidence has come to light, meaning they can't refuse it."  
"That's- that's great news" he lies. Twitchy nose.

I hum a little whilst I ponder over his lies, then change topic.  
"Why do you hate me, Liam?"  
"I don't hate yo-"

"-I mean you must hate me, right? Why else would you and your wife steal 1.6 Billion US dollars from the government and pin the blame on me. What did I ever do to you?" I ask matter of factly.

"I- I don't-"  
"- You know exactly what I mean. Don't try and deny it, the cops are at your place as we speak, finding the money and looking through every single nuck and cranny of your home. Finally, finally you'll understand how invasive it is to have someone riffling through every part of your personal life" I warn him.

"Okay, you listen to me, twink. I can make your life a living hell-"  
"-It already is! Because news flash, I'm in hell!" I laugh.

"Worse. I can make it worse for you. Your little old mum, all alone in that big empty house, be a shame if she had a little accident on the stairs-" he starts to threaten and I butt in.

"- you stay the hell away from my mum-"

"-Or what about Greg and Theo? Be a shame if a complaint was made that got them evicted and Greg lost his job due to not disclosing a previous criminal record-"

"- He hasn't got a record-"  
"-Not yet he hasn't. But I can easily add one in" he snarls and my cockyness drops.

"What do you want?" I whisper.  
"Drop the appeal. You serve your time like the guilty little criminal you are, and your family's lives aren't ruined" he smirks.  
"And if I refuse?" I frown, because let's face it, that doesn't sound very appealing.

"Well, let's just say, your mum, brother and nephew aren't the only ones I can get to. I can easily get someone else to beat you up in here"

"I actually think I'm used to it" I scoff.  
"Or rape you. Elliot has had his eye on you, I wouldn't even have to pay him, he'd do it for the pleasure" Liam goads.  
"Justin's beat him too it" I challenege with an eye raise. It's nothing to brag about, but at least Liam can't take that part of me. It's already been taken.

"Yo- you were raped?"  
"Don't look shocked" I whisper.  
"By Justin?"  
"One of a few" I shrug and he actually looks sorry. Genuinely sorry for the situation he's put me in.

"I- I'm sorry Niall. I didn't mean for that to happen"  
"I can't stay in here Liam. I really can't" I almost beg, my voice cracking a little as I struggle to keep the tears in.  
"You can. And you will. Or else I might just have to get someone to pay your mum and Greg and Theo and Harry and Gemma and Louis and Zayn a visit" he warns.

"You can't! They haven't done anything, it was all me-"  
"-Nice try Niall. But, if you walk, their lives can get, difficult"

*Ding*   *Ding*

"Times up. Inmates, stay seated." Jamie calls from one end of the room. All the guests stand up and say their goodbyes before leaving and then the inmates are allowed to stand and leave through the other gates. The one leading us back to the prison cell.

 

Back to hell.

 

How can I leave now?

I can get protection for my mum Gemma, Greg and Theo. I don't really care about Zayn and Louis can look after himself. So can Harry for that matter. But I don't want to put Harry in danger.

 

I love him too much to do that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG THAT WAS INTENSE!!
> 
> YAY! WE GOT TO SEE SOME VULNERABLE HARRY!


	8. Chapter 8

Harry pov

When Niall comes back from his visit he's disheartened and has definatly been crying, but he refuses to talk about it when I ask, so I don't force him. He climbs up to his bunk and flops down before pretending to be asleep but really he's crying to himself. I can hear him.

I sigh and stand up before going to Louis and Zayn’s room.

"Hey guys" I mutter as I enter the room and sprawl out on Louis bed.  
"Hey"  
"Sup" Zayn groans from the top bunk and rolls over, signalling he doesn't want to join in the conversation.

"What up with you? You look like someone ran over your dog" Louis mutters from where he's playing some card game with himself.  
"I don't have a dog" I frown.  
"Okay you look like, if you had a dog, someone ran it over" he rolls his eyes at me.

"It's Niall"  
"When isn't it Niall? Seriously, you're so gone for this boy"  
"I know! I know okay?"  
"Soooooo, have you told him yet?"  
"I'm not telling him. I told you that" I say firmly.

"I know you did, I just thought you'd have changed your mind by now" he shrugs and deals me in for a game of 21.

We don't talk for a while. We just play cards in silence, for what must be 20 minutes or so.

"He feels the same. You know that right?"  
"Leave it Lou" I mutter and Chuck my cards down in defeat as my hand has gone bust.  
"He does! I can see it on his little face"

"It doesn't make any difference. I'm not telling him because then he won't leave and I'm not being the reason he stays in this god forsaken hell hole" I snap and he nods slowly before asking if he can say one more thing on the topic. I sigh but nod.

"I think you'll regret it if you don’t tell him"  
"Well, that's a decision I'll have to live with"

 

We play 21 for another hour before going to do our chores and then getting some food. When we head back to my room I see Niall sat on his bed with an obvious razor in his hand and I can tell he's cutting.

"Hey" I call from the doorway and he jumps a little before hiding under the sheet.  
"Oh- h-hey. I was- um- just- um?-"

"-I know you were cutting. I know you cut. I know you don't want to talk about it, hence I didn't mention it" I sigh and sit on the edge of my bunk. I feel Louis hover in the doorway, as if he doesn't know whether to give us space or come in and try to reason with us.

"H- how did you -um- know?" He stutters.  
"We've had sex Niall. I've seen you naked, I saw the scars" I mutter and Louis eyes go wide at me mentioning us fucking.

"Oh- I guess you want an explanation" he mutters.  
"No. I'm done trying to figure you out" I snap.

I can't help it. I honestly can't. After everything I've done for him and everything I've protected him from, he does this? How does he think this will help? How does he think this will make things better? This won't fix anything!! How selfish can the stupid boy be?! Why would he hurt himself after all the pain he's already been through?? It's frustrating because I love him so much and why the fuck is he always in pain when I can't fucking do anything to stop it!?!

"O-oh. Okay" he frowns.  
"Niall why don't- why don't you talk to us? Tell us what's going on in your little head?" Louis says softly and urges Niall to get down from his bunk and join me and Louis on my bed.

"I'm never getting out of here" he sighs.  
"Yeah, yeah you are. The ball is rolling babe, you'll be out this time next week -at the trial" Louis assures him.

"I can't. I can't leave. I have to abandon the appeal" he whispers.  
"What? After everything we've-"  
"-Harry! Calm down. Why do you have to abandon the appeal?" Louis soothes.

"Liam came to see me. He said he'd hurt everyone who helped. He listed you all. My brother Greg and my nephew Theo. My mum, both of you, Zayn, Gemma. I can't do that to you all"

"We'll be fine Niall-"  
"-And what if you aren't Harry? I love you, okay? I love you and I won't be the reason you and your family get hurt. I won't be the reason anyone gets hurt" Niall snaps.

"I love you too babe, which is why I won't let you do time for something you haven't done. Trust me baby, we'll be fine. Okay?" I whisper in his ear.  
I peck his soft cheek and rub my thumb over his hand before pecking his lips gently.

"I can't let you get hurt because of me"  
"I won't baby. You think I can't look after myself?" I chuckle.  
"I know you can. But what about your family and people you care about? People can hurt you without physically hurting YOU" he sighs and I can tell he's put a lot of thought into this.

"Ni- I'll be okay-"  
"-I'm not prepared to take that chance Harry. You mean too much to me" he says quietly before leaving my bunk and heading out in to the hallway, which judging by the time, he's going for his weekly weight checks.

"So what now?" Louis asks carefully.  
"I don't know. He's never going to survive 10 years in here and by the sounds of it he's not following through with the appeal. So fuck knows" I sigh.  
"It may be wise to keep an eye on him then" Louis says cautiously.

"You think he'll cut too deep?" I frown.  
"I think it's possible. He can't stay but he can't leave. Depends how desperate he becomes"  
"Will you keep an eye on him too?" I ask carefully and Louis assures me I don't even need to ask, he's got my back.

After a few rounds of poker, 21 and Blackjack we call it a day and go for dinner.

 

 

 

It's a week later when what Louis said, finally sinks in.

I'm laid in Nialls bed with him, making out when he tells me again that he loves me.  
"I know. I know babe, I love you too" I frown.

"I just want you to remember that"  
"Babe you're scaring me"  
"I just- I mean- I want us to have sex- like now? And um- I want you to know I love you"  
"I love you too babe" I whisper into his soft lips.

I press my lips firmly against his a few times before biting his bottom lip, causing him to moan and allowing me to plunge my tongue into his mouth. I lick over his braces and suck his own tongue into my mouth before running my hand over his chest and stomache. I then slide my hand up under his shirt and rub his hip bone gently. He moans again and I roll over so I'm straddling his waist and force him to fully lay down onto his back. His hands run over my shirted chest lightly and he tugs at the hem, asking me to remove it. I comply and drop the shirt to the floor. His eyes go wide and his pupils dilate at the sight of me shirtless and I can feel his erection against my arse which only makes me want him more.

I kiss him once again, firmer this time. Exploring his mouth with my tongue, using it to trace over his little teeth and silver braces and suck his own tongue into my mouth slowly. He groans and I can feel him humping up into my arse with his crotch- which only makes the situation hotter!!

I sit him up carefully and remove his shirt before throwing it to the floor and laying him back down.

"God you're beautiful" I groan and he moans lightly as I grind down into him. I climb off of him carefully and remove his joggers and then my own before climbing back on top of him, only this time, laid down.

We make out for a while longer, our lips battling for dominance and hips grinding against each other before he complains he's getting close and asks if we can go further. I remove both of our boxers before grabbing some lube and a condom (courtesy of Louis and his smuggling contacts). I lube up three fingers before circling the first at Nialls rim and pressing in lightly. His body resists slightly at first and I kiss him gently to reassure him that I'm safe and I'm not the people who raped him. 

Once the first finger is all the way in his tight heat, I pump it in and out slightly before pulling out and adding a second. Again his body resists and I kiss his head before asking if he wants to stop.

"No! No, I want you Haz. My arse is just tight. It's not used to being, you know, um- penetrated"

I smile lightly at his word choice and kiss him again before scissoring my fingers and pumping them a little faster inside him, purposely avoiding his prostrate as I know he's not got the best stamina and if I hit it too much, he'll finish before I get inside him.

I pull out my two fingers and add a third to open him up properly and stretching him out for me.

I pump the three fingers inside him for longer, to make sure he's properly prepped and I won't hurt him. All the while he's groaning and humping up against my fingers so he can fuck himself on me. I let him for a moment, relishing in the blissed out look on his face, along with the sweaty face and messed up hair, bright red face, neck and chest and pure look of pleasure on his face when he manages to hit his prostrate with my fingers.

"Ugh- there! There Haz! Please- ugh- more- more- more- ugh god Harry" he whines as he fuck himself with my fingers. He's fucking gorgeous.

"Shhhhh baby, the walls are thin" I whisper to him, but it turns into a moan as he clenches around my fingers. I hate that he can't be as vocal as he clearly is, but if we get caught, our sentences get extended, and I don't want that for him"

"S-sorry. God it's so good" he whimpers and one hand comes to grab my waist whilst the other fists the bed sheets. His hand is gripping my side quite hard and I can feel his blunt little nails making little half moon crescents in my skin. I love it. I love that I'll be able to remember this for days to come, and all I have to do is look at the marks or run my finger tips over the indentations to feel his body against mine.

"I love you vocal babe, but we aren't supposed to have sex, so, we'll get reprimanded if we're caught" I mumble into his sweaty neck. I kiss it anyway and breath in the sweet smell of man and boy mixed with arousal, sweat and sex. God I want to devour him.

"Okay. Yeah. Yeah okay. Right" he mumbles and I can tell he isn't aware of what he's saying at the moment.

I lube up my cock and press it gently as his hole as I slide my fingers out of him. He whines at the loss of pleasure and presses his hips against my cock to make it slip into him a little. It's only the tip though and I place my hands on his hips to stop his movements.

"Babe? Can't we talk about these after?" I ask carefully and run my finger tips lightly over his scars. Some are fresh and are no older than a day. Some are weeks, months old. It kills me to see them. It kills me to see them on his beautiful porcelain skin, mixed in with his freckles and two leg hairs that he's failing to grow, like they're a part of him. They shouldn't be. He should never have such heart breaking scars on his stunning body. Especially for such a small and intoxicating person. He's the sun. That's my conclusion about him. Niall Horan, is the sun shine. He's bright and funny and loud and cheers people up. And it's hard to think of the sun having a dark side. A painful side. A side that is full or torture and sadness and despair. But it does. Because Niall is the sun shine, but this is his dark side. And I want to get him back to the point where he is light and life itself. Because that's who he is. He is bright and brave and strong and provides light and life to everyone around him. Just like the sun.

"Later maybe? Please not now" he whispers and I agree with a peck to his lips.

"I know I said later, and I mean that, but I just want to say one thing, if I May?" I whisper and he sighs but nods.  
"I love you. I love you on the good days and the bad days. I love you on the happy and sad days and I love you on the brave and the weak days. Because that's what love is. And, I may not be able to cure your pain, even though I really wish I could, I can't. But, I will listen. I will be there to protect you and make you feel safe and strong and warm and to love you on the days when you don't even know who you are. I will be there, holding your hand and reminding you that you're not alone" I whisper to him and I can feel a few tears fall down my face. I sigh at the act of weakness and move my hand to remove them but Niall beats me to it. He grabs my cheeks with his hands and uses his thumbs to clear the tears.

"I love you Harry and I'm glad I got sentenced, because it lead me to you. You're the best thing to ever happen to me" he smiles softly and I can see him keeping tears at bay.

"I would do anything for you. You know that right?" I smile lightly.

"I know. I know You would Haz" he whispers and pecks my lips.

I grab his cock and give it a few pumps to get him back in the mood, using the pre-cum that's all over his thigh to lubricate my hand to glide easier.

"It's Okay, I'm in the mood and I'm close so, fuck me. Please" he chuckles and I peck his lips gently, letting go of his wet cock to grab his hair and tilt his head the way I want it for the make out session.

"I'm not going to fuck you. I'm gonna make love to you" I say quietly, feeling rather vulnerable and afraid he might laugh at me. He doesn't. His eyes light up like a child at Christmas and his cheeks flush impossibly redder.  
"I would love you to do that. You don't have to shy around me. You can do cute stuff and I won't think any less of you. I won't tell anyone about you letting your guard down" he says gently.

"The times when I feel most confident is when I’m allowing myself to be vulnerable” I mutter and he beams at me before telling me he loves my vulnerable side.

I grin stupidly at him before he flips us over and straddles my waist. He kisses me a few times before lining himself up on my cock and trying to go down on me. It doesn't work as my cock just moves to the side and he looks so embarrassed that I kiss his little pouty face, hold my cock steady for him and nod at him to sink down again. He does and moans as he surrounds my cock with his warm, wet heat and I groan from how tight he is.

I place my hands on his narrow hips and help lift him for a few minutes to help him get a pattern as it soon becomes obvious to me, that he's never rode a cock before and can't form a proper rhythm on his own. He's trying though. And it's hot that he's trying. He clenches his arse a few times and I groan before remembering I'm supposed to me making love to him, not having him fuck himself on my cock like a slut in heat. So I promptly flip us back over, causing Niall to frown and complain as I momentarily slip out of him, but as soon as he's settled on his back, I slide back in and search for his prostrate. I find it within three thrusts and he moans my name brokenly and very loudly, prompting me to Shhhhh him again, but this time with a laugh as I thrust into him harder.

I slide myself out and back in for a few minutes all the while kissing Nialls neck and making love bites on his chest and shoulder (where the shirt will hide them). He moans louder as I make the bites and I can feel him humping up into me with desperation from need and want. It's quite funny when Louis comes in and tells us to shut but because he can hear us from three rooms away.

"You'll get caught if you don't shut the fuck up" he sasses.  
"You're just jealous you're not- getting any" I pant as I thrust into Niall harder, making him groan my name and forget Louis is stood there watching me fuck into him. I keep eye contact with Louis as I thrust harder and faster into Niall, trying to make him jealous that I get to make Niall feel like this. I get to see him whilst he's this gorgeous. He rolls his eyes at me, pretending to he unaffected but I can see he's getting aroused.

"You'll put the bed through the wall if you keep fucking him like that" Louis comments dryly and I notice the bed is in fact banging harshly against the wall as I rock into him. I shrug with smug grin and a little 'I don't care' laugh, and thrust a little harder.

"God Haz, harder! Ugh- harder" Niall moans and I can see Louis boner from here. He storms out when he realises I've seen it and closes the door.

"You close babe?"  
"Y-yeah! Oh my god! Fuck! Oh my god. Yes Harry! Ugh- Ugh -Ugh. G-gonna cum" he whines and I grab his cock to pump him through his orgasm. He whines into my chest and I bite into his chest as he clenches around my arse, causing me to release into the Jonny and collapse on top of him.

"That- that was great" he pants.  
"Yeah. It was" I grin and kiss his sweaty head before rolling off of him to lay next to him.

"Did I hurt you?" I mumble a moment later when I've caught my breath.  
"No. No it was amazing" he grins and I can see the sleep taking over him slowly.

"I'll clean up babe, you relax" I whisper into his lips and kiss him a few times. He grins and lazily kisses me back but I can see he's pretty much asleep. I crawl to the edge of the bed and jump down before grabbing some tissue and cleaning myself up. I climb back up and clean Niall up before covering him with the sheet and flopping down next to him for a cuddle.

 

 

I'm woken up to the sensation that I'm drowning. My immediate reaction is to punch, kick and growl at the intruder before I open my eyes and see where I am, but more importantly, assess what the danger is and where the fuck Niall is. I soon realise I’ve had water poured over my head.

I'm met with Niall grabbing onto me for dear life and I grab him to assure him he's going no where. I then realise that Justin, Cole, Damen and Sami have entered our room. Cole is sat against the door, blocking it, and whilst he's only one man, he's around 28 stone and I have no chance of moving him when he's sat down as he's a dead weight.

Justin is sat at the bottom of Nialls bed with a smug look on his face and the other two are stood not far from the bed, I can tell they're armed by the way they're hiding their hands behind their backs.

"So, I heard that sexy activity earlier and let me just say, it was good wank material. Right boys?" Justin smirks and all the boys agree, Sami even goes as far as to rub his cock suggestively, making Damen laugh but I stand natural. I got a glace at his weapon. Army swish knife. Small and compact. Can't go too deep due to the length but they're sharp as fuck and can make you bleed -a lot. 

"What do you want?" I ask, appearing bored and I move Niall so he's sat behind me, I stroke his shaking hands gently first before giving his body with mine.

"I want in on the action" he grins and his eyes are full of malice and derangement.  
"Never in a million years" I challenge.  
"Well, maybe you'll change your mind once I've had a chat with your boyfriend" he mocks.  
"You touch a hair on his head and you'll wish you were dead" I growl and he flinched slightly before remembering there's 4 of them against essentially one of me, because let's face it, Niall isn't doing to be any good in a fight.

"I don't want you to get hurt" Niall whispers to me and I squeeze his hand gently to assure him I won't.  
"So, are you sharing? Or do you need some persuasion?" Justin asks casually I simply glare at him. He knows my answer. There's no way, on earth, I'm letting any of them touch him.

"Come on Styles! Even you can see you're out numbered! You haven't a chance of defending yourself never mind him!" Damen laughs and I glance at him before looking him up and down, seemingly unamused.

"So what? You think I'll give him up? Not a chance Bieber" I laugh dryly.  
"How about a deal?" He smirks, still thinking he has the upper hand. I raise my eyebrow at him to signal I'm listening.

"He blows us all, you both walk free" he smirks.  


"O-okay" a small voice behind me pipes up and I glance behind me to meet Nialls terrified eyes.  
"No Niall" I hiss at him.  
"Harry they're armed. What are you going to do? You're alone don't have a weapon" he glares at me.  
"I'm not letting you do this-"  
"- You can't stop me" he snaps and moves me out of the way gently to sit closer to Justin, who simply pushes Niall sideways, off of the top bunk and he lands on the floor on his side with a groan. I jump over the side and sit next to him asking if he's okay, but he's crying and by the looks of it, he's broken his arm.

"Baby are you okay?" I whisper and he nods slowly.  
"Come on then Blondie. Suck it" Justin grins and jumps down also, he drops his jeans and grabs Nialls face, forcing his beautiful face in to the crotch of that monster.  
"Get off him!" I roar at him and shove him away from Niall. That just causes Damen to pull out his army knife, Sami to pull out his, what appears to be, kitchen knife and Justin to pull out his Stanley knife.

"Big mistake" Cole grins from the doorway and I once again move Niall behind me.  
“I’ll do it instead” I mutter. I’m not proud. I’m really not. But I'd rather me suck off three guys and fat slob than Niall, he’s been hurt enough.  
“You? Wow. You really are gone for him aren’t you?” Justin smirks and I sigh but don’t answer. I don’t need to. They know the answer. It’s true, I am gone for him. I meant it when I said I’d do anything for him.  
“Leave Niall alone" I say firmly.  
“No. I want him" Justin smirks and makes his way towards us with his knife. I step back out if instinct and make Niall walk backwards too, him still behind me.  
I avoid the first swing from Sami and push him away from me but get stabbed lightly in the arm by Damen who seems new to the job as he’s to happy boasting that he got me, to realise I’d taken the knife off of him and stabbed him in the thigh. I push him to the floor and roll him away from me, keeping the knife obviously. Cool. Now I have a weapon too. I wince as I notice my arm and the laceration. It's fairly deep but not long, should be fine for now. I manage to disarm Sami and stab him in the neck, after taking another stab to the same arm, this one is longer and I can feel the muscles in my left arm shut down as the blood trickles out and onto the floor. Niall is stood behind me crying his adorable little eyes out and as much as I wish I could comfort him, right now my priority is keeping us both alive.  


“Walk out now while you can" I mutter to Justin and he just laughs.  


“Not a chance”  
I make to stab Justin in the side but bison goes blurry and I lose my balance, causing me to drop my weapon and collapse on the floor. I pant lightly to myself before trying to regain my vision. I’m losing too much blood. I know I am. I glance over and see Niall on the floor with Justin taking off his joggers. Damen goes to restrain Nialls arms because despite the fact I stabbed him, apparently he wants to rape Niall more than he wants to die!  


“So bitch! Because your boyfriend can’t play by the rules, I’m upping the stakes. I think I'll fuck you again instead. You were so tight the first time. Such a weak little bitch, crying for your mummy like a fucking baby" Justin snaps at Niall who just cries into his hands as his boxers are pulled down.  


I crawl. It's agony due to my arm, but I use very ounce of strength I have and pull myself over to them. I meet Nialls eyes and I can see the pure fear and delegation on his face. The desperation to not be in this situation AGAIN. And I get it. I understand why he cuts. Because whilst he feels the sting of the blade, he feels something other than numb. He can handle physical pain, but mental and emotional pain never really goes away and you can’t really cure it. A bruise fades or a cut heals, a broken bone mends and a fracture repairs itself. But he emotional torture that comes from being raped, that lasts a life time. I finally get it now.

I crawl over to them bit Damen sees me and boots me in the face with his good leg. He then boots me in the ribs and stab me in the chest before removing the knife. I whimper as the blade leaves my skin. I can feel my vision failing dramatically now and I can feel my heart slow down. It’s failing. But the only thing I can think of, is Niall being raped. So I flip onto my side, grab the discarded knife and stab Damen in the other leg, before using all of my strength to remove the knife. Justin jumps back from shock and glares at me as I cover Nialls terrified body with my own.

“B-baby? I got you- yeah?” I stutter as I feel more blood leave my body and my body become impossibly lighter.  
“I can’t lose you" he cries and kisses my lips softly.  
“I know, be brave, yeah?” I murmer and kiss him back slowly.  
“As soon as you die I’ll rape him. Every day till the day he dies” Justin comments and I can feel the smirk from here.  
“Haz? You- you said you’d do anything for me? Yeah?” He asks quietly and I nod with the last bit of energy I have.  


“Take me with you” he whispers.  
I meet his eyes, his gorgeous blue ocean like eyes see the need. The need to not be here. Well, I did figure out he couldn’t leave and couldn’t stay. I guess we have a solution.  


“I’ll make it painless baby. I love you, and, and I’ll see you on the other side" I whisper, tears rolling down my face as I place my hands rather side of his beautiful neck. The last thing I want to do is hurt my baby, I hope he knows that.  
“I love you and I trust you. I meant it when I said I’m not afraid of you Harry”  


“No!” I hear Jamie shout from the doorway as I snap his neck, killing him instantly, with the last shred of strength I have.

The crunch haunts me for the 2 minutes I stay alive, but then I take my last breath, and breath out a sigh of relief that Niall is safe. We can finally be together, even if it’s not in life.

 

Because Niall is the sun, and he’s finally safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG!!!
> 
> WAS THAT AN OKAY ENDING???
> 
> DID ANYONE CRY??? (I DID)


End file.
